Dodgers Can Suck Snotrockets

I hate the Dodgers. Filthy rotten scumbag Dodgers. No-good disgusting disease-ridden loathsome Dodgers. Everything about them is vile and nasty and putrid. Have I mentioned that I hate the Dodgers? Yeah.

Madison Bumgarner had another stellar outing on Saturday and in doing so laid waste the Los Angeles Dodgers. It was a great outing for him: not only did he pitch extremely well but Bumgarner also had 2 RBI. The only place where he didn’t shine was in the snotrocket category. However I place the blame for that solely on Fox Sports. Their cameras are very anti-pitcher; they focus almost everywhere on the field but the pitcher’s mound. Even the players in the on-deck circle got more coverage than Bumgarner. Who cares about the batter who’s up next? WE NEED TO SEE THE SNOTROCKETS. I hate Fox almost as much as the Dodgers.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, July 6, 2013 at home vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers:

  • W, 7.0 IP, 3 H, 0 BB, 2 R, 2 ER, 9 K, 1 HR, 3 SNR (snotrockets): 2 vs. lefties, 0 vs. righties, 1 other. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s 3 snotrockets came in the 4th, 5th and 6th innings.
  • This game’s total of 3 SNR (snotrockets) is the fewest number of SNR that Bumgarner has blown all season.
  • Other Madison Bumgarner SNR (snotrocket) totals of note: he now has 29 SNR vs. the Dodgers this season.

One of the highlights of this game was the fact that the Dodgers OF Yasiel Puig struck out 4 times against the Giants, and 3 of those 4 K’s came while facing Bumgarner. I celebrated this feat on Twitter:

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As I mentioned the game aired on Fox Sports and we were unlucky enough to get Joe Buck and Tim McCarver as broadcasters. Buck and McCarver spent most of the game waxing rhapsodic over the Dodgers. I discussed this with some other Giants fans on Twitter:

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And…

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Note on Joe Buck’s “tablecloth” shirt: he was wearing gingham and he just wasn’t pulling it off. As I noted yesterday:

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Enough about Fox Sports and Joe Buck.

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Thursday, July 11 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket action. And since the game won’t be on Fox we should see a lot of Bumgarner mucus rocketing out in Petco Park. I can hardly wait.

Oh yeah one more thing: Fuck the Dodgers.

Fox Snotrockets

Today’s San Francisco Giants game was on Fox instead of Comcast Sports Net. That meant we were either going to get Mitch Williams (who I can’t stand) or Tim McCarver (who I can’t stand) to broadcast the game. So not that it mattered but it ended up being McCarver who was his usual McCarverian self. Or as one person on Twitter put it:

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Anyway, on to more important matters. Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket (SNR) totals from today’s loss to the Braves:

  • 16 SNR: 0 vs. L, 6 vs. R, 10 other. 2 pre-game SNR.
  • Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 5th in which he blew 5 snotrockets.

Not a great day for Bumgarner pitching-wise (a loss) but snotrocket-wise it was pretty good. The 16 snotrockets he blew today were just 2 short of his season high of 18 which he’s reached twice in 2012 (4/23/12 vs. Mets on the road and 6/28/12 vs. Reds at home).

I live-tweet most every Bumgarner start so if you’re interested you can follow me on Twitter (see the Twitter follow button on the right hand side of this page). Most of the Giants fans who follow me on Twitter seem to enjoy my snotrocket tallying and we all have some fun with it. During Bumgarner’s previous start vs. the Dodgers in L.A. I was quite pleased to see the following tweet appear in my timeline:

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Cool, huh? 🙂

Bumgarner’s next start should be Friday August 31 in Chicago. See you here or on Twitter for some Windy City snotrockets.