Foxed Up Snotrockets

 

Saturday baseball = yay

Saturday baseball on Fox Network = not so yay

Saturday baseball on Fox Network in which the Giants lose to the Dodgers = kill me now

The Giants lost. The Dodgers won. Madison Bumgarner blew snotrockets in enemy territory. The Fox Network broadcasting team waxed rhapsodic over the Dodgers and got a lot of things wrong. Sigh.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, June 16, 2018 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (eww):

 

  • L, 6.0 IP, 5 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 4 BB (1 IBB), 3 K, 2 HR, 3 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 3 vs. righties, 0 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 2 snotrockets.
  • All three of Bumgarner’s snotrockets tonight came while facing Dodgers RHB Chris Taylor.
  • Bumgarner now with 9 snotrockets in the 2018 season.

 

So not a lot of snotrockets in this game but @SanDiegoGiants managed to snag a few anyway. First up is an early snotrocket from the 1st inning:

 

After that there weren’t any snotrockets seen until the 3rd inning. We were then treated to the sight of two rapid-fire snotrockets, one after the other in quick succession. While this might have caused confusion in some people there was no doubt in my mind as to what happened:

 

3rd inning snotrocket, number one:

 

3rd inning snotrocket, number two:

 

Bonus Bumgarner goodies – intense glove wipe:

 

Frustrated Bum:

 

Mad MadBum:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be this Friday, June 22, 2018 at home vs. the San Diego Padres. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

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Gorilla Glue Snotrockets

 

You win some, you lose some, you no-decision some. Hopefully you blow a few snotrockets too.

The San Francisco Giants were in Miami today to play the Marlins. Madison Bumgarner was on the mound and I was on my laptop, ready to tally all the snotrockets that would surely be flowing today. Only they didn’t exactly flow; more like they trickled. It was not an abundant day for snotrockets.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, June 11, 2018 on the road vs. the Miami Marlins (closed roof):

 

  • ND, 5.1 IP, 6 H, 4 R, 4 ER, 1 BB, 3 K, 1 HR, 1 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 0 vs. righties, 1 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 5th in which he blew 1 snotrocket.
  • Bumgarner now with 6 snotrockets in the 2018 season.

 

See what I meant by ‘trickled’? One snotrocket for the entire game is a paltry amount. Regardless of the meager amount of mucus blown we here at Bumgarner Snotrockets aim to always satisfy your snotrocket cravings so here are not one but two screencaps of the same snotrocket. First up is @iamjerklord’s screencap, taken from the right side:

 

While I managed to capture the left side of the same snotrocket:

 

Other Madison news: Mr. Bumgarner was not pleased with umpire Jeremie (Don’t Spell It Jeremy) Rehak’s work behind the plate tonight. Madison is not shy about demonstrating his feelings when it comes to calls that he feels he’s not getting on his pitches but tonight he seemed especially dissatisfied. I saw a crazy amount of animation from Bumgarner, more than I’ve ever seen from him. Thus you have the Puppy Head Tilt Edition:

 

C’mon Ump Edition:

 

Bumgarner decided to have a little chat with the home plate ump in between innings:

 

It looked like maybe Bum was trying to make nice with Rehak there but that didn’t last long:

 

After Bumgarner gave up a couple of runs in the bottom of the 6th inning Giants manager Bruce Bochy pulled him from the game. As Bumgarner was walking towards the Giants dugout he could be seen mouthing a few words towards home plate:

 

Saying ‘blinking fertilizer’ to any umpire apparently results in an automatic ejection from the game, even if you’ve already been removed from said game by your manager. Bumgarner was very droll about his first career ejection:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be this Saturday, June 16, 2018 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (eeuw). See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

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Restoration Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner is back! The snotrockets are back! The San Francisco Giants’ quiet offense is back! You should only be happy about two of those things!

Yes, Mr. Bumgarner has returned from his stint on the broken pinky list. He looked great, pitched great and snotrocketed great. Unfortunately the Giants did not hit great and so Bumgarner was tagged with an undeserved loss. Eight hits resulting in only two runs is no way to celebrate the return of your hero, boys.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Tuesday, June 5, 2018 at home vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks:

 

  • L, 6.0 IP, 8 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 3 K, 5 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 2 vs. righties, 3 other. 2 pre-game SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 5 snotrockets in the 2018 season.

 

Oh how I have missed this:

Giants-Bumgarner-Snotrocket-2018-06-05-2

 

I wasn’t the only one who had snotrocket yearnings. First-rate snotrocket screencapper @SanDiegoGiants was overcome with emotion:

 

Other fans were also thrilled at the sight of Bumgarner’s mucus:

 

Bumgarner started the game off strong:

 

Hot snot:

 

Pie chart snot:

 

Poetry in motion:

 

Bonus Bumgarner screencaps – Loogie Bubble Edition:

 

If you follow me on Twitter you get very important Madison Bumgarner info like this:

 

I will also provide you with visual wedgie proof:

 

Yes, the Giants lost this game but:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be next Monday, June 11, 2018 on the road vs. the Miami Marlins. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting snotrocket, loogie and wedgie pick action.

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Broken Pinky 1, Snotrockets 0

 

Yesterday was shaping up to be a pretty good day. The skies were clear, the air was crisp, spring training was almost over and Opening Day was getting close. In fact we were just six days away from seeing one of these beauties:

 

So I was feeling good, the snotrocket anticipation was building and all seemed right with the world.

Then:

 

*whimpering sounds*:

 

I took the news well:

 

Quite well indeed:

 

I’M FINE:

 

The worst has come true. For the second year in a row Madison Bumgarner will miss a significant portion of a season because of an injury. Why? Why do these things keep happening to Bumgarner, the Giants and the fans? What did we do to deserve this misery? I had a theory:

 

It seems like the only fair thing to do:

 

Memories:

 

The real tragedy:

 

So that’s that. Madison Bumgarner will be out for the first two months of the season, most likely. Hopefully he’ll come back before the All Star Game but only time will tell. Bear with me as I slowly recover from this most tragic of tragedies. I don’t know when I’ll get back to tallying some more vintage Bumgarner snotrockets because it’s still so raw and I’m still in mourning:

 

But rest assured that at some point the healing will begin and I will tally snotrockets once again. This I vow. So follow me on Twitter and/or check back here soon for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Get well soon, Mr. Bumgarner. We miss you already.

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September Snotrockets

 

Another fine Madison Bumgarner outing, another Madison Bumgarner loss. 7 IP and only 1 run given up yet Mr. Bumgarner was tagged with a loss in this game from 2010 because his teammates couldn’t score any runs for him. The passage of eight years doesn’t lessen the pain of an undeserved L. For shame Giants, for shame.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, September 11, 2010 on the road vs. the San Diego Padres:

 

  • L, 7 IP, 3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 4 K, 1 HR, 10 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 3 vs. righties, 6 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 4th in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner through 15 starts in 2010 had 156 snotrockets.

 

All these vintage snotrockets from years ago are difficult to get great screencaps of as the video quality from these old games isn’t good. But our motto here at Bumgarner Snotrockets is ‘A Fuzzy Bumgarner Snotrocket Is Better Than No Bumgarner Snotrocket’ so first up is a fuzz covered snotrocket from the end of the 4th inning:

 

Another very similar looking fuzzy snotrocket this time from the 5th inning:

 

That one was followed almost immediately by another super fuzzy, face-melting snotrocket:

 

And finally one last snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start after this one was at home against the Brewers. I will probably be live tweeting as I watch that game so follow me on Twitter or as always check back here at this blog next week for all the exciting vintage Bumgarner snotrocket action.

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Interior Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner’s 14th start of 2010 took place on the road against the Diamondbacks and as is often the case for games in the hot Arizona desert the roof to Chase Field was closed meaning we had indoor snotrockets. “But is it considered good etiquette to blow snotrockets indoors?” you may ask. I’m pretty sure Miss Manners never covered this question before so let me be the one to say yes of course, it’s good manners to let the snotrockets fly inside but only if your name is Madison Bumgarner.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, September 6, 2010 on the road vs. the Arizona Diamondbacks:

 

  • ND, 7.1 IP, 5 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 7 K, 12 SNR (snotrockets): 6 vs. lefties, 2 vs righties, 4 other. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner through 14 starts in 2010 had 146 snotrockets.

 

Maybe it was because the roof was closed or maybe the snotrocket gods smiled upon me while watching this game today but I managed to get several pretty good snotrocket screencaps from Bumgarner’s outing. First Bumgarner snotrocket of the game was from the bottom of the 1st inning:

 

Another 1st inning snotrocket blown approximately 9 minutes after the first one:

 

Obstructed view snotrocket from the 2nd inning:

 

Bumgarner’s last snotrocket of the game came in the 7th inning:

 

Last snotrocket was followed by an after snarl:

 

Bonus screencap: Since the game was in Arizona I was looking forward to hearing Joe Garagiola again as he was so much fun to listen to the last time the Giants played the Diamondbacks. Unfortunately Mr. Garagiola had the night off so Mark Grace was the DBacks color guy in this game and he was about as colorful as a cotton ball. This was the only remotely interesting thing he did that day. He was attempting to bribe the Diamondbacks CEO or something, I don’t know:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start after this one was another road game, this time against the San Diego Padres. I should be live-tweeting that game so follow me on Twitter or meet me back here next week for all the exciting Bumgarner vintage snotrocket action.

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No Decision Snotrockets

 

Another stop on the Madison Bumgarner Vintage Snotrocket Tour was made today and it was a good one. There was plenty of mucus flying around AT&T Park that summer night in 2010. Let’s get to it, shall we?

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Tuesday, August 31, 2010 at home vs. the Colorado Rockies:

 

  • ND, 6.0 IP, 5 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 3 BB, 2 K, 1 HBP, 10 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 1 other.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 1st, 2nd, 4th and 5th innings in which he blew 2 snotrockets per inning.
  • Madison Bumgarner through 13 starts in 2010 had 134 snotrockets.

 

Most of the snotrockets from this game were seen from a distance so they weren’t ideal screencapping material but I did manage to get a couple. Here’s a shy snotrocket from the 5th inning:

 

And a more visible but still fuzzy snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start after that August 31 one was a September game in Arizona vs. the Diamondbacks. Will there be snotrockets blown or snotrockets left stored in Bumgarner’s magical nose? Tune in here or follow me on Twitter to find out!

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