Activated Snotrockets

Madison Bumgarner was reinstated from the injured list last Friday but I’m only just now getting around to publishing his snotrocket stats from that game. Unacceptable and I will try to do better in the future.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, July 16, 2021 at home vs. the Chicago Cubs (closed roof):

L, 6.0 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, 1 HR, 2 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 1 vs. righties, 1 other. 2 indoor SNR.

Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 3rd and 4th in which he blew 1 snotrocket per inning.

Bumgarner now with 134 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

Ordinarily a mere two snotrockets would be a disappointing output from Bumgarner but I’m so glad that he’s back pitching and snotrocketing that I’ll take those two SNR and be happy about it.

Since there weren’t that many snotrockets I was able to get screenshots of both of them. The first snotrocket back:

 

The only other snotrocket of the game:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start was today and I missed it. So much for my resolutions and good intentions. Sigh. I will most likely watch it tomorrow so come back then for more Bumgarner snotrocketing goodness.

Few Snotrockets And Other Bad News

 

There weren’t many snotrockets in Madison Bumgarner’s latest start. That alone was bad enough but then came the news that Bumgarner won’t be pitching for a while as he experienced some left shoulder pain. Get well soon Madison.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Wednesday, June 2, 2021 at home vs. the New York Mets:

 

  • ND, 2.0 IP, 8 H, 5 R, 5 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, 1 HR, 3 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 1 vs. righties, 2 other. 1 pre-game SNR. 3 indoor SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 1st in which he blew 3 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 132 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

I bet you were worried that since there were so few snotrockets then there might not be any snotrocket screenshots. Well don’t worry, I got you. Bumgarner blew three snotrockets in this game, all in the 1st inning, and I captured all three. Here’s the first snotrocket of the game:

 

Second snotrocket:

 

Bumgarner gave up a three run homer in the 1st inning and this was his reaction:

 

I’m not sure when Madison Bumgarner’s next start will be as he is nursing his sore left shoulder. Let’s all think good thoughts and hopefully he’ll be pitching (and snotrocketing) soon. When he does you can find me here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Imperfect Snotrockets

 

The title is misleading. Madison Bumgarner’s snotrockets are always perfect. This game however was not. That’s okay. It may be just me but I’ll take a snotrocket victory over a real one any day.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, May 28, 2021 at home vs. the St. Louis Cardinals:

 

  • L, 4.0 IP, 5 H, 7 R, 6 ER, 4 BB, 4 K, 2 HR, 6 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 2 other. 3 glove SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 2nd and 3rd in which he blew 2 snotrockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 129 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

So not that many snotrockets for Madison this time out but I was able to get some screenshots. First snotrocket of the game was a nice glove one:

 

Second inning snotrocket was also a glove one:

 

We got a classic snotrocket in the third inning:

 

Another classic shot of snot in the third:

 

Final snotrocket of the game was in the fourth inning:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Wednesday, June 2, 2021 at home vs. the New York Mets. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

High Altitude Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner pitched two days ago in Denver. Is thin air good for snotrockets? I have a feeling that where Bumgarner is concerned any air is good for snotrockets.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, May 22, 2021 on the road vs. the Colorado Rockies:

 

  • L, 6.0 IP, 8 H, 7 R, 5 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, 1 HR, 14 SNR (snotrockets): 4 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 6 other. 1 on-deck SNR. 2 double SNR. 1 double blow SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 6th in which he blew 4 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 123 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

Before the game started they showed a clip of Bumgarner talking after his previous start and it was classic homespun Bum. Please never change:

 

His snotrocket production in yesterday’s game was also classic Bumgarner. Double digit numbers, double snotrockets, a double blow snotrocket, snotrockets on-deck and at-bat, everything but a glove snotrocket. Vintage Bum.

The first snotrocket, first inning:

 

Second inning snot:

 

The first of two double snotrockets in yesterday’s game happened in the fourth inning. In the 4th Bumgarner shot out of his right nostril first:

 

Then once he was done with the right one Bumgarner moved to the left:

 

Long distance side view of a snotrocket:

 

At-bat snotrocket in the fifth inning:

 

Another fifth inning snotrocket:

 

More fifth inning snot:

 

Sixth inning solo snotrocket:

 

Another double snotrocket occurred in the sixth inning, with the left nostril going first:

 

It was followed immediately by the right nostril:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be either this Thursday or Friday vs. the St. Louis Cardinals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Innovative Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner has been pitching in the big leagues since 2009 and he still manages to surprise me. For the second time this season Bumgarner came up with a new kind of snotrocket. Last week he produced his first ever hybrid snotrocket, a double snotrocket that was half glove, half regular. His next start saw him with another first: a triple snotrocket that was also a glove, double glove and a double blow. I was so stunned when I first saw it that I had no idea how to classify it:

 

After much pondering I decided to include it in three different snot rocket categories: triple snotrocket (new), double glove and double blow. And now writing this I just realized that Bumgarner has never blown a double glove snotrocket so that’s yet another new kind of snotrocket for him. Madison Bumgarner is a snotrocket genius.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, May 17, 2021 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (ew):

  • L, 4.0 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 4 BB, 5 K, 1 HR, 19 SNR (snotrockets) : 3 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 7 other. 7 ½ glove SNR. 2 at bat SNR. 2 double SNR. 1 hybrid SNR. 1 triple SNR. 1 double glove SNR. 1 double blow SNR. 1 on deck SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 8 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 109 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

Not only Madison Bumgarner but also the Arizona Diamondbacks television crew had me perplexed while watching this game:

 

Don’t worry, I did indeed rewatch the game from the beginning and got that snotrocket recorded in the right category (other) and at the right time too (7:36 PM) too. You’re welcome.

There was yet another surprise in this game:

 

Look at Bumgarner, inspiring awe and imitation snotrocketing in his teammates. By the way this also happened with the Giants:

 

Other players expelling mucus are all very well and good but let us get to the King of the Snotrockets. First snot rocket of the game:

 

A classic snot rocket also from the 1st inning:

 

Long distance glove snotrocket from the 2nd inning:

 

At bat snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

 

Hungry for snot rockets:

 

Bumgarner had two double snotrockets in the 3rd inning. The first one was your ordinary, garden variety, classic double snotrocket. It started with the left nostril:

 

And was followed by the right nostril:

 

The other double snotrocket was the new, fresh and exciting hybrid snotrocket. The gloved left nostril side went first:

 

Bare handed right nostril portion of the hybrid snotrocket was second:

 

The new hybrid snotrockets are very impressive and flashy so it’s unfortunate that both times they’ve happened this season they’ve been shown at a distance. I hope we get to see a hybrid SNR up close and personal soon.

Bumgarner was really cranking out the snot in the 3rd inning. Here’s another from the eight SNR that he produced in the 3rd:

 

An almost identical snotrocket a few minutes later. If you look closely you’ll see that Bumgarner’s finger isn’t quite on his nose. That’s because no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get a clear well-defined shot of the actual snot rocket. I had to settle for what we will call a snotrocket approach:

 

Bumgarner started off the 4th inning with the always fun dugout snotrocket:

 

Fierce snot rocket also from the 4th inning:

 

Different angle of the same snotrocket:

 

I was able to get this second angle shot because I when I went back to replay the game I accidentally clicked on the Dodgers broadcast (ew) instead of the Diamondbacks one. Of course they would use two different camera crews which would produce two entirely different versions of the same game. For consistency in snotrocket tallying I try to always use the home team’s broadcast but in this case I was glad I made that mistake on the rewatch because it was kind of nice and rare to get two angles of the same snot rocket. That mistake though also caused a small bit of panic because on my Bumgarner snotrocket scorecard I had him down for two snotrockets blown while facing the Dodgers’ Sheldon Neuse in the 4th inning, one regular and one glove SNR. But the Dodgers broadcast didn’t show the glove snotrocket while the Diamondbacks one did. I was starting to seriously doubt my snotrocket tallying skills until I heard the announcers talking and realized they were with the Dodgers. Phew. My snotrocket record remains unsullied.

The new electrifying triple, glove, double glove, double blow snotrocket too happened in the 4th inning but it’s nearly impossible to capture how spectacular this was in screenshot form. It needs video or a gif to do it justice because a double blow snotrocket is when Bumgarner blows out of the same nostril twice; this is different from a regular double (not double blow) snotrocket which is when Madison blows mucus from both nostrils. If you want to see it in action you’ll need to watch the game on MLB TV and go to Gavin Lux’s at-bat in the 4th inning. But even though it’s not the same as seeing it in motion I still had to commemorate the occasion with screenshots so here’s the best that I could do. It started out with the gloved part and left nostril:

 

While the glove part of the triple snotrocket was still taking place they switched TV angles so here it is continued from a different view:

 

I couldn’t get a great shot of the regular barehanded/right nostril part of the triple SNR because Bumgarner still had his back to the camera so this was the best that I could do:

 

The most exciting thing to happen Bumgarner snotrocket-wise in years and 2/3 of it happened with his back to the camera. Sigh.

The last Bumgarner snot rocket of the game was an on-deck one in the top of the 5th inning:

 

Madison left the game after only throwing 80 pitches in 4 innings because of an injury that hopefully isn’t too serious. Shoutout to Bumgarner’s thighs for teaching me a new word – adductor:

 

I almost forgot to include my favorite screenshot of Bumgarner from this game. It wasn’t even a snotrocket but a nose scratch:

 

If Madison Bumgarner’s thighs and groin are cooperating his next start should be this Saturday, May 22, 2021 on the road vs. the Colorado Rockies. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Hybrid And Other Snotrockets

 

Another Madison Bumgarner outstanding pitching performance, another Madison Bumgarner snotrocketing achievement. I could get used to so much greatness.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Tuesday, May 11, 2021 at home vs. the Miami Marlins:

 

  • W, 7.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 9 K, 0 HR, 17 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 5 other. 1 double SNR. 1 hybrid SNR. 4 ½ glove SNR. 2 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 3rd and 6th in which he blew 4 snotrockets per inning.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s total of 17 snotrockets in this game is his highest total since March 27, 2019 (14 snot rockets – Giants at Padres).
  • Bumgarner blew at least 1 snotrocket in every inning he pitched (7 innings).
  • Bumgarner now with 90 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

 

Bumgarner’s start last night saw the birth of a new snotrocket statistic:

 

To the best of my knowledge Madison Bumgarner has never blown a half glove, half regular snotrocket before. I was so surprised when I first saw it last night that I had no idea how to classify it. Should I put it in the double snotrocket category? Should I create a whole new category of snotrocket stat? Do I call it a glove snotrocket? After much pondering I finally decided to do all three. Of course I had to get screenshots of this brand new kind of snotrocket but it wasn’t easy. This one wasn’t shown close up but at a distance, shot from behind home plate and looking out towards the pitching mound. So the quality isn’t the best but it’s better than nothing. First up is the left nostril, glove half of the hybrid snotrocket:

 

Next is the right nostril, bare hand half:

 

Look at that. Dazzling, isn’t it? I felt honored and grateful to be a witness to such a momentous event. And now you can say the same thing.

More snotrocket screenshots. First up is a classic one from the 2nd inning:

 

Another snotrocket from the mid 2nd:

 

Long distance snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

 

Another long distance one from the 4th inning:

 

A nice glove snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

At-bat snotrocket also from the 6th inning:

 

Another snotrocket from the same at-bat:

 

The last snotrocket of the night was a glove snotrocket in the 7th inning:

 

Something pretty funny happened in last night’s game. During one of Madison Bumgarner’s at-bats a banner ad for a law firm appeared on screen and for reasons well known to anyone familiar with Bumgarner’s history it seemed, er, appropriate:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be this Sunday, May 16, 2021 at home vs. the Washington Nationals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Fish Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner had another good outing, going 6 innings and only giving up 2 hits and 1 run. However much like his time with the San Francisco Giants he got scant run support and received a no-decision. That’s the bad news. The good news is that Bumgarner once again reached double digits in snotrockets. That’s a win in my book.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Thursday, May 6, 2021 on the road vs. the Miami Marlins:

 

  • ND, 6.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K, 1 HR, 13 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 7    vs. righties, 5 other. 1 at-bat SNR. 5 glove SNR. 13 indoor SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 4th and 6th when he blew 4 snot rockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 73 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

 

Some snotrocket screenshots from the game. I really like this first one. Maybe it’s because you can see one nostril in full view which makes it funny for some reason:

 

From the same inning:

 

Bumgarner is too polite to blow a snot rocket directly onto home plate so during an at-bat he turned his head away to expel the mucus:

 

Classic snotrocket:

 

A nice close-up snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

One of 5 (!) glove snotrockets that Bumgarner blew in this game:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Tuesday, May 11, 2021 at home vs. the Miami Marlins again. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Friday Night Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner was having a fine game tonight against the Rockies, only giving up 4 hits and 1 earned run in 5 innings. He was just at 81 pitches but for some reason the Dbacks didn’t let him go back out for the 6th. Oh well, at least they let him go 5 for the win so that’s good. What’s also good is that it was another great night for Bumgarner snotrockets.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, April 30, 2021 at home vs. the Colorado Rockies:

 

  • W, 5.0 IP, 4 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 6 K, 10 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 5 other. 1 pregame SNR. 4 glove SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 4 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 60 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

 

The first snotrocket of tonight’s game was a pre-game one:

 

A couple of classic snotrockets from the 3rd inning:

 

Bumgarner had 4 glove snotrockets in tonight’s game which may or may not be a personal record for him. Here are 3 of the 4 (the missing glove snotrocket was not suitable for screenshotting as half of Bumgarner’s head was cut off by the cameras):

 

Last snotrocket of the game:

 

Important distinction:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Thursday, May 6, 2021 on the road vs. the Miami Marlins. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

No Hit Snotrockets

Madison Bumgarner pitched the second game of an Arizona Diamondbacks doubleheader this past Sunday and owing to MLB commissioner Rob Manfred’s reign of terror both games were set to only go 7 innings each instead of the regular and sane 9. This Manfred-induced abomination was made even worse by the fact that Madison Bumgarner pitched a beauty of a game: he went the full 7 (sigh) giving up no hits. He also blew a lot of snotrockets but we’ll get to that in a moment. So Bumgarner threw a no-hitter yesterday in the eyes of everyone but Major League Baseball; they refused to credit Madison with a no-no because MLB is a mess these days. A 7 inning doubleheader game is considered an official game but a 7 inning doubleheader game in which a pitcher gives up no hits is not considered an official no-hitter. How does that make sense?

Madison Bumgarner threw a no-hitter yesterday. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it. He also once again for the 4th time in 5 starts reached double digits in snotrockets so we have two things to celebrate.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Sunday, April 25, 2021 on the road vs. the Atlanta Braves:

  • W, 7.0 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 7 K, 12 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 3 other. 2 glove SNR. 1 double SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 3rd and 6th in which he blew 4 snotrockets per inning.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 50 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

There was some confusion as to the nature of one of yesterday’s snotrockets. At first glance one of them looked to be a thumb snotrocket which would be highly unusual for Bumgarner. A thumb snotrocket is one where the thumb is used instead of the forefinger to expel the mucus. Offhand I can’t think of the last time Bumgarner used his thumb or if he has ever used it. Some people might let it go one way or the other, thumb snotrocket, not a thumb snotrocket but I’m a professional snotrocket tallier so I had to make sure:

The snotrocket in question:

I mean, clearly it’s a regular snotrocket and not the more exotic thumb snotrocket but again I had to make sure.

Other snotrockets in the game were less controversial. Here’s a classic snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

Glove snotrocket also from the 3rd:

The 3rd inning was a popular one for snotrockets. Here’s one where the Diamondbacks broadcast tried to cut away with a graphic but Madison snuck in a snotrocket before they could complete it:

6th inning glove snotrocket:

Another from the 6th inning:

A nice clear well lit snotrocket:

The 7th inning saw a Bumgarner classic, the double snotrocket. First the left nostril as seen from a distance:

Bumgarner tried to be sneaky and turn away from the camera to shoot the right side of his double snotrocket but you can’t hide from me, Madison:

One final snotrocket of the game:

After Bumgarner got the final out of his no-hitter his teammates congratulated him:

So did some Dbacks fans but I was unimpressed:

When Bumgarner was on the Giants he was the frequent recipient of that most famous of embraces, The Buster Hug™. Madison has moved on to Arizona but he left his heart in San Francisco:

Madison Bumgarner’s next start will probably be Saturday, May 1, 2021 at home vs. the Colorado Rockies. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

One more thing:

Biggie Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner had a fine day today. He got his first win of the 2021 season but more importantly he was once again in the double digits in snotrockets. Attaboy Bumgarner.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Sunday, April 18, 2021 on the road vs. the Washington Nationals:

  • W, 5.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 5 K, 1 HR, 14 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 7 vs. righties, 4 other. 3 glove SNR. 3 at-bat SNR. 1 double blow SNR. 1 dugout SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 5th in which he blew 5 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 38 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

I was able to get some pretty good snotrocket screenshots from this game including several glove snotrockets. The first one was a sneaky glove snotrocket caught from behind:

 

Another glove snotrocket, this time with a better view:

 

Long distance glove snotrocket:

 

I was very fortunate to witness three at-bat snotrockets today. First one:

 

Bumgarner’s second at-bat snotrocket was so good the home plate umpire couldn’t take his eyes off of it. Nationals catcher Yan Gomes however was unimpressed:

 

The third at-bat snotrocket was another long distance one:

 

These snotrocket screenshots are in no particular order as this one occurred in the 1st:

 

Biggie snotrocket:

 

What better way to celebrate a win than with a dugout snotrocket:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Saturday, April 24, 2021 on the road vs. the Atlanta Braves. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.