Imperfect Snotrockets

 

The title is misleading. Madison Bumgarner’s snotrockets are always perfect. This game however was not. That’s okay. It may be just me but I’ll take a snotrocket victory over a real one any day.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Friday, May 28, 2021 at home vs. the St. Louis Cardinals:

 

  • L, 4.0 IP, 5 H, 7 R, 6 ER, 4 BB, 4 K, 2 HR, 6 SNR (snotrockets): 0 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 2 other. 3 glove SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 2nd and 3rd in which he blew 2 snotrockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 129 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

So not that many snotrockets for Madison this time out but I was able to get some screenshots. First snotrocket of the game was a nice glove one:

 

Second inning snotrocket was also a glove one:

 

We got a classic snotrocket in the third inning:

 

Another classic shot of snot in the third:

 

Final snotrocket of the game was in the fourth inning:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Wednesday, June 2, 2021 at home vs. the New York Mets. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

High Altitude Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner pitched two days ago in Denver. Is thin air good for snotrockets? I have a feeling that where Bumgarner is concerned any air is good for snotrockets.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Saturday, May 22, 2021 on the road vs. the Colorado Rockies:

 

  • L, 6.0 IP, 8 H, 7 R, 5 ER, 0 BB, 2 K, 1 HR, 14 SNR (snotrockets): 4 vs. lefties, 4 vs. righties, 6 other. 1 on-deck SNR. 2 double SNR. 1 double blow SNR. 1 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 6th in which he blew 4 snotrockets.
  • Bumgarner now with 123 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

 

Before the game started they showed a clip of Bumgarner talking after his previous start and it was classic homespun Bum. Please never change:

 

His snotrocket production in yesterday’s game was also classic Bumgarner. Double digit numbers, double snotrockets, a double blow snotrocket, snotrockets on-deck and at-bat, everything but a glove snotrocket. Vintage Bum.

The first snotrocket, first inning:

 

Second inning snot:

 

The first of two double snotrockets in yesterday’s game happened in the fourth inning. In the 4th Bumgarner shot out of his right nostril first:

 

Then once he was done with the right one Bumgarner moved to the left:

 

Long distance side view of a snotrocket:

 

At-bat snotrocket in the fifth inning:

 

Another fifth inning snotrocket:

 

More fifth inning snot:

 

Sixth inning solo snotrocket:

 

Another double snotrocket occurred in the sixth inning, with the left nostril going first:

 

It was followed immediately by the right nostril:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be either this Thursday or Friday vs. the St. Louis Cardinals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Innovative Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner has been pitching in the big leagues since 2009 and he still manages to surprise me. For the second time this season Bumgarner came up with a new kind of snotrocket. Last week he produced his first ever hybrid snotrocket, a double snotrocket that was half glove, half regular. His next start saw him with another first: a triple snotrocket that was also a glove, double glove and a double blow. I was so stunned when I first saw it that I had no idea how to classify it:

 

After much pondering I decided to include it in three different snot rocket categories: triple snotrocket (new), double glove and double blow. And now writing this I just realized that Bumgarner has never blown a double glove snotrocket so that’s yet another new kind of snotrocket for him. Madison Bumgarner is a snotrocket genius.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Monday, May 17, 2021 on the road vs. the Los Angeles Dodgers (ew):

  • L, 4.0 IP, 2 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 4 BB, 5 K, 1 HR, 19 SNR (snotrockets) : 3 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 7 other. 7 ½ glove SNR. 2 at bat SNR. 2 double SNR. 1 hybrid SNR. 1 triple SNR. 1 double glove SNR. 1 double blow SNR. 1 on deck SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific inning was the 3rd in which he blew 8 snotrockets.
  • Madison Bumgarner now with 109 snot rockets in the 2021 season.

Not only Madison Bumgarner but also the Arizona Diamondbacks television crew had me perplexed while watching this game:

 

Don’t worry, I did indeed rewatch the game from the beginning and got that snotrocket recorded in the right category (other) and at the right time too (7:36 PM) too. You’re welcome.

There was yet another surprise in this game:

 

Look at Bumgarner, inspiring awe and imitation snotrocketing in his teammates. By the way this also happened with the Giants:

 

Other players expelling mucus are all very well and good but let us get to the King of the Snotrockets. First snot rocket of the game:

 

A classic snot rocket also from the 1st inning:

 

Long distance glove snotrocket from the 2nd inning:

 

At bat snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

 

Hungry for snot rockets:

 

Bumgarner had two double snotrockets in the 3rd inning. The first one was your ordinary, garden variety, classic double snotrocket. It started with the left nostril:

 

And was followed by the right nostril:

 

The other double snotrocket was the new, fresh and exciting hybrid snotrocket. The gloved left nostril side went first:

 

Bare handed right nostril portion of the hybrid snotrocket was second:

 

The new hybrid snotrockets are very impressive and flashy so it’s unfortunate that both times they’ve happened this season they’ve been shown at a distance. I hope we get to see a hybrid SNR up close and personal soon.

Bumgarner was really cranking out the snot in the 3rd inning. Here’s another from the eight SNR that he produced in the 3rd:

 

An almost identical snotrocket a few minutes later. If you look closely you’ll see that Bumgarner’s finger isn’t quite on his nose. That’s because no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t get a clear well-defined shot of the actual snot rocket. I had to settle for what we will call a snotrocket approach:

 

Bumgarner started off the 4th inning with the always fun dugout snotrocket:

 

Fierce snot rocket also from the 4th inning:

 

Different angle of the same snotrocket:

 

I was able to get this second angle shot because I when I went back to replay the game I accidentally clicked on the Dodgers broadcast (ew) instead of the Diamondbacks one. Of course they would use two different camera crews which would produce two entirely different versions of the same game. For consistency in snotrocket tallying I try to always use the home team’s broadcast but in this case I was glad I made that mistake on the rewatch because it was kind of nice and rare to get two angles of the same snot rocket. That mistake though also caused a small bit of panic because on my Bumgarner snotrocket scorecard I had him down for two snotrockets blown while facing the Dodgers’ Sheldon Neuse in the 4th inning, one regular and one glove SNR. But the Dodgers broadcast didn’t show the glove snotrocket while the Diamondbacks one did. I was starting to seriously doubt my snotrocket tallying skills until I heard the announcers talking and realized they were with the Dodgers. Phew. My snotrocket record remains unsullied.

The new electrifying triple, glove, double glove, double blow snotrocket too happened in the 4th inning but it’s nearly impossible to capture how spectacular this was in screenshot form. It needs video or a gif to do it justice because a double blow snotrocket is when Bumgarner blows out of the same nostril twice; this is different from a regular double (not double blow) snotrocket which is when Madison blows mucus from both nostrils. If you want to see it in action you’ll need to watch the game on MLB TV and go to Gavin Lux’s at-bat in the 4th inning. But even though it’s not the same as seeing it in motion I still had to commemorate the occasion with screenshots so here’s the best that I could do. It started out with the gloved part and left nostril:

 

While the glove part of the triple snotrocket was still taking place they switched TV angles so here it is continued from a different view:

 

I couldn’t get a great shot of the regular barehanded/right nostril part of the triple SNR because Bumgarner still had his back to the camera so this was the best that I could do:

 

The most exciting thing to happen Bumgarner snotrocket-wise in years and 2/3 of it happened with his back to the camera. Sigh.

The last Bumgarner snot rocket of the game was an on-deck one in the top of the 5th inning:

 

Madison left the game after only throwing 80 pitches in 4 innings because of an injury that hopefully isn’t too serious. Shoutout to Bumgarner’s thighs for teaching me a new word – adductor:

 

I almost forgot to include my favorite screenshot of Bumgarner from this game. It wasn’t even a snotrocket but a nose scratch:

 

If Madison Bumgarner’s thighs and groin are cooperating his next start should be this Saturday, May 22, 2021 on the road vs. the Colorado Rockies. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Hybrid And Other Snotrockets

 

Another Madison Bumgarner outstanding pitching performance, another Madison Bumgarner snotrocketing achievement. I could get used to so much greatness.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Tuesday, May 11, 2021 at home vs. the Miami Marlins:

 

  • W, 7.0 IP, 4 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 9 K, 0 HR, 17 SNR (snotrockets): 3 vs. lefties, 9 vs. righties, 5 other. 1 double SNR. 1 hybrid SNR. 4 ½ glove SNR. 2 at-bat SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 3rd and 6th in which he blew 4 snotrockets per inning.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s total of 17 snotrockets in this game is his highest total since March 27, 2019 (14 snot rockets – Giants at Padres).
  • Bumgarner blew at least 1 snotrocket in every inning he pitched (7 innings).
  • Bumgarner now with 90 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

 

Bumgarner’s start last night saw the birth of a new snotrocket statistic:

 

To the best of my knowledge Madison Bumgarner has never blown a half glove, half regular snotrocket before. I was so surprised when I first saw it last night that I had no idea how to classify it. Should I put it in the double snotrocket category? Should I create a whole new category of snotrocket stat? Do I call it a glove snotrocket? After much pondering I finally decided to do all three. Of course I had to get screenshots of this brand new kind of snotrocket but it wasn’t easy. This one wasn’t shown close up but at a distance, shot from behind home plate and looking out towards the pitching mound. So the quality isn’t the best but it’s better than nothing. First up is the left nostril, glove half of the hybrid snotrocket:

 

Next is the right nostril, bare hand half:

 

Look at that. Dazzling, isn’t it? I felt honored and grateful to be a witness to such a momentous event. And now you can say the same thing.

More snotrocket screenshots. First up is a classic one from the 2nd inning:

 

Another snotrocket from the mid 2nd:

 

Long distance snotrocket from the 3rd inning:

 

Another long distance one from the 4th inning:

 

A nice glove snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

At-bat snotrocket also from the 6th inning:

 

Another snotrocket from the same at-bat:

 

The last snotrocket of the night was a glove snotrocket in the 7th inning:

 

Something pretty funny happened in last night’s game. During one of Madison Bumgarner’s at-bats a banner ad for a law firm appeared on screen and for reasons well known to anyone familiar with Bumgarner’s history it seemed, er, appropriate:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be this Sunday, May 16, 2021 at home vs. the Washington Nationals. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.

Fish Snotrockets

 

Madison Bumgarner had another good outing, going 6 innings and only giving up 2 hits and 1 run. However much like his time with the San Francisco Giants he got scant run support and received a no-decision. That’s the bad news. The good news is that Bumgarner once again reached double digits in snotrockets. That’s a win in my book.

Here are Madison Bumgarner’s snotrocket totals and other vital statistics for Thursday, May 6, 2021 on the road vs. the Miami Marlins:

 

  • ND, 6.0 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 0 BB, 7 K, 1 HR, 13 SNR (snotrockets): 1 vs. lefties, 7    vs. righties, 5 other. 1 at-bat SNR. 5 glove SNR. 13 indoor SNR.
  • Madison Bumgarner’s most prolific innings were the 4th and 6th when he blew 4 snot rockets per inning.
  • Bumgarner now with 73 snotrockets in the 2021 season.

 

Some snotrocket screenshots from the game. I really like this first one. Maybe it’s because you can see one nostril in full view which makes it funny for some reason:

 

From the same inning:

 

Bumgarner is too polite to blow a snot rocket directly onto home plate so during an at-bat he turned his head away to expel the mucus:

 

Classic snotrocket:

 

A nice close-up snotrocket from the 6th inning:

 

One of 5 (!) glove snotrockets that Bumgarner blew in this game:

 

Madison Bumgarner’s next start should be Tuesday, May 11, 2021 at home vs. the Miami Marlins again. See you here or on Twitter for all the exciting Bumgarner snotrocket action.